About Me

Sunnyside, NY, United States
I'm a superhero in training. I'm also my own comic relief.

July 23, 2010

August 22, 2007

Liquored Up Celebrity Strippers

Just one of the many things that I have never encountered in my entire life, let alone on my birthday. Said birthday was on the 20th, and consisted entirely of me eating a bit of food, going to buy a video game, going home, playing the game for a bit, and then falling asleep, waking up only to find it was too late to do anything more worthwhile.

The next day was a bit less of a drag. At my growth group meeting Rebecca, the leader of the group, went out and bought donuts, a bag of chips, and some Coca Cola. It was hardly what could be called a party, but it was a lot more fun than my 20th birthday party, which never happened at all (unless you count the haircut I got).

The whole experience has awakened a long-dormant desire for more donuts. As I write this I fight the urge to buy some Crispy Cremes.

August 3, 2007

Insomnia

Wednesday, August 1, at approx. 12:00 pm ET I woke up. I have yet to fall asleep since. This currently puts me at 61.5 hours. Now, I have gone through a full week with only a few hours of sleep each day, but I do believe this is the longest I have ever gone with no sleep whatsoever. Now this isn't to say that I have been up, active, and engaged with the world around me this whole time, for I have indeed had lay down and hope I fall asleep time.

Truth be told, I can't be entirely certain that this is insomnia, because it could very well be something else that just pretends to be insomnia and is doing a really good job. I have a bit of a morbid curiosity about how long I can go before I start to crack (my bet is a full week), but it is probably best that I not encourage it.

In conclusion, I blame global warming.

July 28, 2007

Apartment Hunting

So I've decided to hunt for a new apartment. To get started, I went to the sporting goods store to pick up some camouflage, a rifle with a scope, and an apartment call. The place had a bunch of camouflage, but they said I'd have to wait a week for a background check before I could get the gun. I was a bit upset about this, so I told them which of their vertebrae I would like to stick a long knife with poison on it. I should be able to pick my deadly gun up on Tuesday.

As for a proper hunting ground, I was originally thinking of simply selecting a place in New Jersey, but my Growth Group strongly recommended that I instead hunt closer to work. Good apartments are evasive, but I should be able to shoot one down as soon as I get my gun.

The only problem is where to mount the head...I might have to find a new place to live.

Oh, and shout out to my (biological) brother, who is 12 years old today. The (biological) family says he'll get taller than me, but I personally don't think it'll happen. He's growing too much too young, and will burn out by the time he's a teenager.

July 20, 2007

Belts and Ideal Hair Length

As much fun as it is to see the number on the (I suspect) malfunctioning scale decrease, having to wear a belt to keep my pants up is anything but. I don't like belts, and I don't like my underwear showing, and I definitely don't like the idea of buying a new pair of jeans, especially since I got a pair only a few weeks ago. Twenty-five more pounds and I drop under the bicentennial mark.

Now on to hair. As everyone has no doubt noticed, every has a certain length of hair that looks the best, although plenty of people have two or more distinctly different lengths that are equally swell. Two days ago I noticed that I have reached the Ideal Hair Length, and now I am entering the mode of anxiety that comes with knowing that in a matter of weeks my hair will be too long for its own good, and I'll have to start brushing it again! I DON'T HAVE THAT KIND OF TIME, PEOPLE!!